Ryan and Juliet

Tuesday night Ryan and Juliet slept a seven hour stretch (9:45 – 4:45am).  Dan had been awake since 3am wondering if I had fed them or not.  At 4am I woke to find Dan a little frantic.  I went upstairs to check on them and both were sleeping peacefully.  Dan and I remained awake for another 45 minutes until Juliet finally put us out of our torture and woke up hungry.  And so that is the life of new parents I guess.  When our babies finally sleep their first long stretch, we lie awake worrying.

Ryan and Juliet are now just 5 days away from being 3 months old and so this event, sleeping through the night that is, marks the beginning of some major changes (at least that’s what we’ve been told).  Everyone told us after they were born that we just had to survive the first three months and then things would get easier.  Of course then, it felt like it would take a lifetime, and honestly it really did.  But now I find myself wanting to freeze time so that they stay our little itty bitty babies forever.  Soon there will be no more middle of the night feeding and I will miss those quiet moments I have with them when all is so peaceful and quiet.  Just me and my babies.  These are the moments when I see their smiles as they drift off to sleep, and if I’m lucky they will even let out a little giggle.  Juliet will sometimes reach her little hand up to touch my face just to make sure I’m still there while she eats with her eyes closed.  Ryan will smile when his eyes meet mine and it is more than enough to make my heart melt and I am again reassured of his love for me.  And now, as I write this, Ryan sleeps peacefully and adorably on my lap.  These are the moments when I thank the God above for sending me my little angel babies and I promise to love and protect them forever.  And while I wish with all my heart that time will stand still, I also find myself anticipating tomorrow with all eagerness.  I can’t wait for the first time they hug me, or when they run to their daddy when he gets home from work, or when we play arts and crafts together at the kitchen table, or when they get a boo boo and run to me for hugs and kisses (although I don’t really want them to get a boo boo, but unfortunately it will happen). There’s just so much to look forward to, but so much I want to stay the same.

One thing is for sure, anticipating my family’s future is one case where the anticipation will not be greater than the realization.